Let’s Play a Game

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A game sounds fun, right? I bet your wondering what kind of game we will be playing here tonight. Well, it is a guessing game. The winner of this game will get a wonderful prize! Wanna know what it is? Yes! Okay, the winner gets the ever-lasting image of excrement in places it should not be, and the relief that knowing it wasn’t your house or child that did what mine did today!

I bet you’re really curious now. 

Today’s game is called: Guess Where My Son Pooped!

I will give you three choices
1) in the toilet
2) in the back yard
3) in the toy box

What’s that? Oh, you don’t know my kid so you are not sure of what he is capable of. Okay, let’s use the process of elimination (no pun intended, but that made me laugh) to figure this out.

In the beginning, I mentioned that the winner would receive an image of poop where it shouldn’t be so toilet is out.

The back yard is next. Hmmm, while its not my preferred place for my three year old to take a dump, I would have to accept it as okay since I let the dogs do it. I’m going with his reasoning here!

Looks like we have our answer! For those of you that guessed the toy box, ding ding ding you got it right! My son took a big, fat, vegetarian, lentil-fed toddler poop right in the middle if his toys!  How’s that mental image coming?

How did he manage such a feat? Well, in my hopes of potty training my 3 year old we have been doing naked time. A lot of naked time. Since, when we put underwear on him he pees in them immediately, but makes it to the toilet occasionally naked it seems like the logical choice.  However, he has held his poop until the evenings when he gets a diaper for bed. Until today.

I know that convincing children that going number two on the toilet is often challenging. In fact, with my three older children I had a few misdirected pooping incidents; however, they were not vegetarians.  No, their diets were not made of mostly high fiber foods, so clean up was not quite as bad. This was bad.

I have to admit that I threw away many of the toys involved in the incident. I kept only those toys that seemed easily sterilized.

Maybe I am over reacting. I don’t know. How about you? Had any poop mishaps? Or, perhaps you have experience with potty training an extremely strong willed child? I’m open to advice.

Sleep Little Baby….Oh Wait You Are Three!

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I adore my Wee Man! He has the biggest personality I have ever witnessed in some one so young. His imagination knows no limits, and his vocabulary is unmatched by most of his peers. I am not bragging about my boy, okay maybe I am a little, but I am stating facts about my fourth child’s amazing abilities.

However, there is a dark side to my sweet boy. When the lights go out at night he is suddenly a ball of energy! We are not talking about a second wind here. No, we are talking full blown hurricane! This boy does not sleep!
Let me give you an example of a typical week in our house. I am giving you a whole weeks because the pattern takes about seven days with him. I am starting with Sunday, but only for convenience the days may not be accurate just the pattern.

Sunday
Wee Man is up when I get up. big Daddy says he was up all night. wee Man is impossible all morning. He is moving at jet pace. Running around the house like a wild man until he sits still.  Usually around nine or ten in the morning he passes out. Wee Man is out until around three in the afternoon.

Monday
Wee Man went to bed around Midnight Sunday night. He got up at some point and came to bed with Big Daddy, Lady Bug, and Me at some point. Thankfully we have a king-sized bed and a side-carred crib!  He wakes up between six or seven in the morning with me.  There is no nap for Wee Man until he crashes right before dinner! Now, he wakes up around eight and is up until 3AM! Big Daddy rests in between starting new movie for Wee Man, and getting him juice.  I sleep with Lady Bug who nurses all night so I am little help.

Tuesday
Wee Man sleeps till 11 AM. He wakes up refreshed and plays happily for most of the day. Bedtime comes around 8PM.  Wee Man is not tired. he comes out every few minutes to play until around midnight. He passes out, but ends up in our bed at some point.

Wednesday
Wee Man is up early again! This time he passes out around 1PM, which seems like.a.decent time, and I plan to wake him up no later than three. Ha ha ha the joke is on me because Wee Man is not easily awakened. If I do manage to get him up he is miserable. I decide to let him sleep.  Wee Man is up until 3 AM!

Thursday
Up at dawn, Wee Man is noticeably tired. The week is catching up with him. He is throwing toys, hitting people, and acting out of character. I wonder how on earth I will make it with this child. I vow to get him to bed on time, but I know even an hour of sleep will keep him up most, if not all, of the night.  I keep him up the whole miserable day, and he goes to sleep at bedtime. Unfortunately, he was so exhausted that he is up two hours later screaming. He wakes up throughout the night.

Friday
Wee Man wakes late. Around 10 Am he wanders out looking tired. Poor thing got a lot of sleep, but it was not quality sleep.  He spends the day tired and once again crashes early. He spends Friday night awake. Wee Man missed dinner, which he does a lot, and only has a grumpy, tired Big Daddy with whom to socialize. 

Saturday
Wee Man is cranky, tired, and stressed.  I know this life is hard on him. I hate what the sleep schedule, or lack thereof, is doing to him. His bubbly personality is able to shine through the.turkey haze of exhaustion. Every one is suffering. Big Daddy is sleep.deprived and cranky, so we are having a cold war. We don’t want to fight in front of the kids so we just don’t speak unless we have to.  Nothing seems good any more.  My mommy guilt is screaming in my war telling me that I am failing terribly. I turn around and great Wee Man passed out! Here we go again!

There you have it. Our typical week. Now, we do a bedtime ritual, when Wee Man is not sleeping before bedtime. We read books, take a bath, and calm down before lying in bed, but there is not a lot of calming my rambunctious three year old.  I honestly believe that many of his behaviour issues would be solved by a predictable sleep schedule.  However, many other like to give us their not so professional advice, which always includes initials like A.D.D. or A.D.H.D. he is three people! He sits still when needed, and I will not label him before he has had a chances to do anything in life. To call him hyper now will only make him thinks he is hyper forever.

I have been looking around on the internet and nearly every site offers the Ferber method as my best bet at training him to sleep. First, who is coming over to hold him down in his bed to let him cry. There is no way my child will just air there and cry. We would have to threaten bodily harm, and even then he probably wouldn’t believe us and stay in bed.  I don’t let him cry.and I don’t hit him. If those are my only options, well then I guess he is not sleeping!

So, any ideas?  Any one out there with a “good sleeper” that can help a momma out?